yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
