It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
