My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
cat food counts as protein by the way
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Randomize
