So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
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