So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
