You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
