ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
