I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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