I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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