i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
