ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
