i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
