Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Two words: nipple clamps
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