You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
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