ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
did you just send me my own nude
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
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