this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
