dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
it's like iHOP with fire
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Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
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