I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
