its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I AM VODKA MAN
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
