i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
