I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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