Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
