Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
