hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck