Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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