I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
