Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Randomize
