Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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