She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
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Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
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Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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