all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
