Me too!
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
