Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize