I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
