he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
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