She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
