My nipple is on Facebook.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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