It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
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