I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
