he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
