i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
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Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
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Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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