i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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