8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
