piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
