PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
