his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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