So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
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