but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize