I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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