Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
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she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
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I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
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I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!