sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
My pussy is not your playground.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize