return my video game
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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